Deliver my phone from evil.

24 February 2014


It was a regular Friday afternoon, except for the fact that I had been drinking more water than usual. I'm  trying to get my recommended 64 ounce intake every day, and since 64 ounces is about 32 ounces more than I usually consume, my bladder is still adjusting. This means I'm running to the nearest bathroom every 30 minutes like I belong in an overactive bladder commercial. This also means if I try to hold it in while I'm running errands because I don't want to use a public restroom, I'll be sprinting to my toilet once I finally get back home. That's exactly what happened this past Friday. 

In my haste to pee, my phone jumped out of my back pocket just as I was about to sit down, and it went for a little swim in the toilet. As soon as I heard that "plop" sound from beneath me, my heart sank to the bottom of my stomach. I pulled it out immediately, but it was clear the damage had already been done when Siri started trying to communicate something. Yeah, Siri, I know. You're wet, and you shouldn't be. At least I had a good case covering you, and at least I hadn't already peed in the toilet before you fell in. My inner monologue went something along those lines as I ran to the kitchen and grabbed the bag of brown rice I had stashed in my cupboard. 


I didn't quite know the proper procedure for when your phone comes in contact with water, but I knew rice was supposed to help, so I grabbed the first tupperware container I could find and laid it to rest in what was supposed to be a side dish to the grilled chicken I was making for dinner that evening. A quick Google search told me I was supposed to wipe it down with a towel and turn it off first, then place it in a ziplock bag full of rice (who knew there was a formula to this?). So I backtracked and followed those steps. My urge to pee finally came back after I had done all I could do... why is this starting to sound like a medical drama? Does adrenaline suppress one's urge to urinate?

About 24 hours later I took it out the bag to see what the damage really was, and everything was working normally except for keyboard when I tried to write any text. So I tried turning it off, but the "slide to power off" function also started giving me a hard time. Back in the rice it went, and I'm trying my darndest to hold out until Tuesday afternoon, since three to four days is the recommended dry-out time frame according to a few articles I found on Google. Speaking of Google, thank God for Google Voice. I had signed up and got my free phone number a couple years back but never needed to use it - until now. My iPad has been my only means of communication this weekend, and that's only available to me when I'm connected to WiFi. But still, it's better than nothing.

I've never had incidents with my phones. My last iPhone is still going strong in my mother's care, after three+ years, with not one scratch on it. Given my impeccable track record, I politely declined Sprint's equipment insurance, so PLEASE GOD LET THIS RICE DELIVER MY PHONE FROM EVIL.

No phone dropped in the toilet formed against me shall prosper.

2 comments

  1. Oh wow.....I really hope for your sake it'll work because if not...#TeamT-Mobile

    ReplyDelete

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